He makes me melt. He slowly caresses my emotions and self worth. Then bends me and molds me into this different person - like a candle. I used to light my own way. Needing nothing but the oxygen that I burned on my own power. But now there's nothing left of what I once was. I'm vulnerable. He tries to Rebuild me so he doesn't loose the warmth of me. But all that's left of me is the burnt down useless remnants of what I once was.
Native Americans used fire to represent so many things. It represented life and passion and spirit. That's what I once was. But the white men came in and spread their fires into nothing but smoldering ashes. Darkened and gone. The natives were left with no choice but to conform. as hard as they tried they couldn't keep their spirit. it was gone.
That's me. I want to be passionate and I want to do it for him. But I don't know why. I'm the native. He the white man. I the candle and he the one who broke me down. He's the one with happiness and I'm all alone. I've got no where left to run.
Recently I've wished life was a game. Then I could forfeit.
Here, I throw in my last hand.
The games not over,
but the next round will go on.
Without the warmth of me.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Playing with Fire
He makes me melt. He slowly caresses my emotions and self worth. Then bends me and molds me into this different person - like a candle. I used to light my own way. Needing nothing but the oxygen that I burned on my own power. But now there's nothing left of what I once was. I'm vulnerable. He tries to Rebuild me so he doesn't loose the warmth of me. But all that's left of me is the burnt down useless remnants of what I once was.
Native Americans used fire to represent so many things. It represented life and passion and spirit. That's what I once was. But the white men came in and spread their fires into nothing but smoldering ashes. Darkened and gone. The natives were left with no choice but to conform. as hard as they tried they couldn't keep their spirit. it was gone.
That's me. I want to be passionate and I want to do it for him. But I don't know why. I'm the native. He the white man. I the candle and he the one who broke me down. He's the one with happiness and I'm all alone. I've got no where left to run.
Recently I've wished life was a game. Then I could forfeit.
Here, I throw in my last hand.
The games not over,
but the next round will go on.
Without the warmth of me.
Native Americans used fire to represent so many things. It represented life and passion and spirit. That's what I once was. But the white men came in and spread their fires into nothing but smoldering ashes. Darkened and gone. The natives were left with no choice but to conform. as hard as they tried they couldn't keep their spirit. it was gone.
That's me. I want to be passionate and I want to do it for him. But I don't know why. I'm the native. He the white man. I the candle and he the one who broke me down. He's the one with happiness and I'm all alone. I've got no where left to run.
Recently I've wished life was a game. Then I could forfeit.
Here, I throw in my last hand.
The games not over,
but the next round will go on.
Without the warmth of me.
Friday, March 18, 2011
Tell me.
You always say tell me. tell me tell me tell me. Then I finally spill out everything on my mind. And what do you have to say? Nothing.
I'm not complaining, I love him with every ounce of me and more. But I can't figure it out for the life of me. There's so much about me and my life that he is 100% clueless about. And he probably will remain to be clueless. I'm not gonna tell him. It isn't that I don't trust him, because I'd trust him with my life. But there's no point in putting everything out there if I'm not gonna get anything back. If you saved up every penny you could to buy some you really really wanted, you'd expect to get it when you bought it, right? If you saved up and payed for a wedding dress, you wouldn't want a chicken back, would you? No.
That's how I feel. When I finally overflow he isn't there to catch me. But I can't tell him how I feel. Because he gets offended. And then we fight. Like we do every single day. And it's always my fault. I'm usually a pretty bitchy person, and I do and say what I think when I want. But with him I need to stop. Because he doesn't get it. All I'm asking is for a little feedback. This kid is my best friend. He's everything to me.
(Insert depressing and romantic lyrics by obscure band here.)
I'm not complaining, I love him with every ounce of me and more. But I can't figure it out for the life of me. There's so much about me and my life that he is 100% clueless about. And he probably will remain to be clueless. I'm not gonna tell him. It isn't that I don't trust him, because I'd trust him with my life. But there's no point in putting everything out there if I'm not gonna get anything back. If you saved up every penny you could to buy some you really really wanted, you'd expect to get it when you bought it, right? If you saved up and payed for a wedding dress, you wouldn't want a chicken back, would you? No.
That's how I feel. When I finally overflow he isn't there to catch me. But I can't tell him how I feel. Because he gets offended. And then we fight. Like we do every single day. And it's always my fault. I'm usually a pretty bitchy person, and I do and say what I think when I want. But with him I need to stop. Because he doesn't get it. All I'm asking is for a little feedback. This kid is my best friend. He's everything to me.
(Insert depressing and romantic lyrics by obscure band here.)
Thursday, March 17, 2011
This is what usher does to me.
This is what usher does to me
I've loved usher ever since I can remember. Sure he diminished himself during the Superbowl by singing with the black eyed peas. But we all have our moments.
Some people like to listen to scream. Some like country. Others like rock. I like Usher. He's like his own genre in my book. Now, I love other music too. But I generally have five moods.
1. I feel super Badass and just wanna listen to heavy bass music and rap. Artists from my iTunes that fit this playlist are Drake, YoungBloods, the Cateracts, Fort Minor, Eminem, Kanye West, etc.
2. I just wanna dance and have fun. It's like peppy hip hop music that they'd play in a club - minus the techno shit. Its more the stuff that makes you wanna dance in a fun way but also can make you feel a little sexy This includes mostly just Usher. But also Plies, Boys like Girls, Michael Jackson, Akon, Chris Brown, Enrique Iglesias, Ne-Yo, Jay-Z
3. I believe that the reason I love things like photography in nature is my inner hippy. Listening to acousticy bands who also have that kind of island nation sound. Like Bob Marley, Cee Lo Green in his recent "Forget You". Also Train, The Scene Aesthetic,
4. Windows down, hair loose, cruising through life mood. This usually involves country, but really any music that would be played on a commercial that involves a gorgeous, blonde, tan, boho-styled girl in the front seat of a convertible loving her life. Like I said, mostly country. Playlist includes Kenny Chesney songs, She got it made by Plies, Sweet Home Alabama. Those types.
5. Normally, this is a rare one. But lately it's been used much more. This is when I can appreciate the screamed lyrics and the amazing guitar backgrounds. Soo things like Fall Out Boy, A Day To Remember, Bullet for my Valentine. Those "warped tour" type bands.
The music on my iTunes is basically cauterized like this. And anyone who can know what I mean when I just say "5 mood" or something like that. They'd really be good at reading me.
There's two kind of sub categories.
1. The completely useless joke songs of Weird Al and The Lonely Island.
2. The slow depressing music of nickelback, daughtry, etc.
Many Bands fit into different categories, as they have a wide range of songs. Bottom line is...
I'd die without music <3
I've loved usher ever since I can remember. Sure he diminished himself during the Superbowl by singing with the black eyed peas. But we all have our moments.
Some people like to listen to scream. Some like country. Others like rock. I like Usher. He's like his own genre in my book. Now, I love other music too. But I generally have five moods.
1. I feel super Badass and just wanna listen to heavy bass music and rap. Artists from my iTunes that fit this playlist are Drake, YoungBloods, the Cateracts, Fort Minor, Eminem, Kanye West, etc.
2. I just wanna dance and have fun. It's like peppy hip hop music that they'd play in a club - minus the techno shit. Its more the stuff that makes you wanna dance in a fun way but also can make you feel a little sexy This includes mostly just Usher. But also Plies, Boys like Girls, Michael Jackson, Akon, Chris Brown, Enrique Iglesias, Ne-Yo, Jay-Z
3. I believe that the reason I love things like photography in nature is my inner hippy. Listening to acousticy bands who also have that kind of island nation sound. Like Bob Marley, Cee Lo Green in his recent "Forget You". Also Train, The Scene Aesthetic,
4. Windows down, hair loose, cruising through life mood. This usually involves country, but really any music that would be played on a commercial that involves a gorgeous, blonde, tan, boho-styled girl in the front seat of a convertible loving her life. Like I said, mostly country. Playlist includes Kenny Chesney songs, She got it made by Plies, Sweet Home Alabama. Those types.
5. Normally, this is a rare one. But lately it's been used much more. This is when I can appreciate the screamed lyrics and the amazing guitar backgrounds. Soo things like Fall Out Boy, A Day To Remember, Bullet for my Valentine. Those "warped tour" type bands.
The music on my iTunes is basically cauterized like this. And anyone who can know what I mean when I just say "5 mood" or something like that. They'd really be good at reading me.
There's two kind of sub categories.
1. The completely useless joke songs of Weird Al and The Lonely Island.
2. The slow depressing music of nickelback, daughtry, etc.
Many Bands fit into different categories, as they have a wide range of songs. Bottom line is...
I'd die without music <3
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
College.
I think part of the typical American Dream is to get a good education. I've maintained a GPA of 3.8 throughout highschool so far, taking as many Honors/AP courses as possible. And like every other kid, I wanna go to college.
I've been thinking for the longest time about where I want to go. Of course Ohio State University was in my top 5. But the only thing is that I wanna go somewhere. My whole family has stayed in Ohio since we came here from Greece two generations ago. I wanna get out. Sure, I have family down south in the Carolinas and in Florida; hence my hick-ish accent before moving to the North.
I've looked at colleges all over, but I'd really like to stick to the east coast. I've thought about USC and U of MD College Park and some of the colleges Georgia has to offer. Also in my options have been Cornell, Harvard and Yale. It's just all such a huge decision.
Next year, I will begin taking classes at the University of Minnesota as a PSEO(Post Secondary Education Option) Student. However I don't want to stick around here, either.
Right now I have three priorities in finding a college.
First off is riding. I don't care what I do in life as long as I reach my goals in being a good rider. I want to go to France in 2014 and see all of my favorite athletes ride. And maybe in 2022 or 2026, I'll get there too. The problem with riding is that it's so much different than most sports. Almost any sport has a prime age of between 20 and 30. Some of the best riders in the world don't reach their prime until their forties, but usually not until their fifties. Hell, Pat Parelli is one of the best known around and he's gettin' up there.
Second is my other goal in life. I want to travel and learn languages and submerse myself in every culture possible. Yesterday, while sitting at my desk taking off my makeup I tuned in to the chronic drone of my television that always sits propped up on it's shelf glowing. It was all about National Geographic photographers. Hell, I love photography. He doesn't, but I do. Here are my goals in finding a career...
1. I want to have money. Not necessarily so I can splurge on a new Prada purse every day or to dine like Audrey Hepburn, but I'd like to be stable. I want to have horses and maybe someday have kids and be able to give them everything that will help them to be successful.
2. I want to make a difference in someones life. I've been in and out of the hospital for years. And the scariest part for me has always been the IV that's shoved into my brachial artery. Not just because of the needle that seems as long as my hand, but because of that immediate feeling of helplessness. Your eyelids become heavy and you can't control anything. And before you know it you're out. I've always had to force myself to trust that the anesthesiologist knows what they're doing. That's why I want to be that doctor. I want to put people at ease. I've had so many doctors make an impact on my life, and I want to keep that energy going. Even if I don't become a doctor, I wanna help someone.
3.I want to be happy. So many people get into careers thinking they'll love it, but they end up getting burnt out. Take for example; teachers, ER docs, paramedics, therapists; they're all done with loving their job. I want to love my job forever. This is why I always said I'd never go to college for anything equine related, even though horses are my passion.
And last on my list is him. He thinks I freak out too much, but I'm hoping he doesn't read this, because I don't think he cares enough to deeply read through all of this babbling. Even though it could help him out someday.... Regardless, I'm scared to death. I'm madly madly in love with him. Like no one will ever know. And I know that I am. I've had tons of guys I thought I truly loved before, but nothing like this. He's only a year my elder. But the thought of him graduating and going on to college tears me up inside. He's so smart. And he's even told me he's smarter than me. Okay, fine. I'll deal. He thinks I'm just a stupid little kid. I can handle that. But also the fact that I don't think he truly ever thinks about our future. I want him to go to college and be happy. But I know damn well that he can't say no to a lot of things he'll be exposed to in college. I'm also worried about the fact that he's pretty mellow. I feel like he'll want to stick around his family, where he was born and raised. Now, I'm sorry. But I don't give a flying fuck how close you are to your family. You need to get out! You need to see the world. I know so many people who regret staying in the nest. They wish they would've gotten out. Okay... sorry. I'm getting off topic. It scares me that he looks at all these colleges that I'll probably never even consider. I want him to be happy and successful... but I'd really like to be a part of it. I'll be in college for 4, 8 maybe 10 or 12 years. And I want him to be with me for every part of it. And there's no way I can handle long distance that long.. No fucking way.
I've been thinking for the longest time about where I want to go. Of course Ohio State University was in my top 5. But the only thing is that I wanna go somewhere. My whole family has stayed in Ohio since we came here from Greece two generations ago. I wanna get out. Sure, I have family down south in the Carolinas and in Florida; hence my hick-ish accent before moving to the North.
I've looked at colleges all over, but I'd really like to stick to the east coast. I've thought about USC and U of MD College Park and some of the colleges Georgia has to offer. Also in my options have been Cornell, Harvard and Yale. It's just all such a huge decision.
Next year, I will begin taking classes at the University of Minnesota as a PSEO(Post Secondary Education Option) Student. However I don't want to stick around here, either.
Right now I have three priorities in finding a college.
First off is riding. I don't care what I do in life as long as I reach my goals in being a good rider. I want to go to France in 2014 and see all of my favorite athletes ride. And maybe in 2022 or 2026, I'll get there too. The problem with riding is that it's so much different than most sports. Almost any sport has a prime age of between 20 and 30. Some of the best riders in the world don't reach their prime until their forties, but usually not until their fifties. Hell, Pat Parelli is one of the best known around and he's gettin' up there.
Second is my other goal in life. I want to travel and learn languages and submerse myself in every culture possible. Yesterday, while sitting at my desk taking off my makeup I tuned in to the chronic drone of my television that always sits propped up on it's shelf glowing. It was all about National Geographic photographers. Hell, I love photography. He doesn't, but I do. Here are my goals in finding a career...
1. I want to have money. Not necessarily so I can splurge on a new Prada purse every day or to dine like Audrey Hepburn, but I'd like to be stable. I want to have horses and maybe someday have kids and be able to give them everything that will help them to be successful.
2. I want to make a difference in someones life. I've been in and out of the hospital for years. And the scariest part for me has always been the IV that's shoved into my brachial artery. Not just because of the needle that seems as long as my hand, but because of that immediate feeling of helplessness. Your eyelids become heavy and you can't control anything. And before you know it you're out. I've always had to force myself to trust that the anesthesiologist knows what they're doing. That's why I want to be that doctor. I want to put people at ease. I've had so many doctors make an impact on my life, and I want to keep that energy going. Even if I don't become a doctor, I wanna help someone.
3.I want to be happy. So many people get into careers thinking they'll love it, but they end up getting burnt out. Take for example; teachers, ER docs, paramedics, therapists; they're all done with loving their job. I want to love my job forever. This is why I always said I'd never go to college for anything equine related, even though horses are my passion.
And last on my list is him. He thinks I freak out too much, but I'm hoping he doesn't read this, because I don't think he cares enough to deeply read through all of this babbling. Even though it could help him out someday.... Regardless, I'm scared to death. I'm madly madly in love with him. Like no one will ever know. And I know that I am. I've had tons of guys I thought I truly loved before, but nothing like this. He's only a year my elder. But the thought of him graduating and going on to college tears me up inside. He's so smart. And he's even told me he's smarter than me. Okay, fine. I'll deal. He thinks I'm just a stupid little kid. I can handle that. But also the fact that I don't think he truly ever thinks about our future. I want him to go to college and be happy. But I know damn well that he can't say no to a lot of things he'll be exposed to in college. I'm also worried about the fact that he's pretty mellow. I feel like he'll want to stick around his family, where he was born and raised. Now, I'm sorry. But I don't give a flying fuck how close you are to your family. You need to get out! You need to see the world. I know so many people who regret staying in the nest. They wish they would've gotten out. Okay... sorry. I'm getting off topic. It scares me that he looks at all these colleges that I'll probably never even consider. I want him to be happy and successful... but I'd really like to be a part of it. I'll be in college for 4, 8 maybe 10 or 12 years. And I want him to be with me for every part of it. And there's no way I can handle long distance that long.. No fucking way.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Trimester 3.
Trimester one only lasted a few weeks, as I was the new kid at the school. I still feel like the outcast. Is it because I can look at someone prettier than I or smarter than I and not give them a dirty look? Or that I can smile at someone for not particular reason at all? I think most of the population around here is Norwegian or something of the sort. And they're all so damn cold. Now, there are the few exceptions. But for the most part, everyone is just so cold .
I realize that Minnesota is viewed as a dreary, dismal, wet place (I mean 10,000 lakes, right?) but in my eyes there's more to a place than the geographical features. When you plan a vacation, you want to go somewhere because of the beautiful landscape or the favorable climate. How often do we go somewhere for the people? Now, I don't mean a vacation to see your family. I mean a trip for atmosphere.
Ever since I migrated to this new habitat, I've noticed a downturn in my own personality. Friday nights used to be the best things in the world. You just couldn't wait for the bell at the end of 11th period to ring because you had big plans for the night. If it was during the fall, you were going to the football game. If football season was over, all of your friends had a plan to get together. Whether you were going down to the river, or having a campfire, or hitting up chapel hill. There was always something to do.
Then I came to the north. Everything is so different. I spend hours every night studying. Just because I have to. It seems like people around here are so... so... dense. That's the word. My IQ has been higher than my teachers' ever since third grade. But I could take what I learned and apply it to real life and use it again later. I feel like people around here only swallow information to throw it up later. Not to absorb the nutrients from it to grow.
From fourth grade through eighth, I was in OASIS. OASIS stands for "Opportunities for Advanced Students in Stow." The reason you were put into OASIS was the following; you think differently . I think differently and I always have. It's just unfortunate that all of these kids have been so brainwashed into not being able to think outside of the box. Maybe that's why they're all stuck here. And will be. For generations more.
So here's my new schedule.. it's sooo much better
1)Honors Biology C - Last tri was okay. But this tri my teacher is SOOO much better.
2)Self-Defense... yeah
3)Honors Algebra 2C - It isn't that I didn't like my teacher last tri. I just think this tri will be a breeeeeeze. Thank god.
4) Digital Photography C - Don't worry.. I'll rant about my shitty teacher in that class in another post. I am gonna try to start posting more pictures though. I'm trying to get back into photography after having that teacher crush my passion for it...
5)Honors Lit/Writing II - No teacher will ever compare to my Honors 10 English teacher back at my old school. He actually taught me something.
6) Espanol III C - Me gusta mi maestra pero yo quiero tener mi maestro da la trimestere pasado... fue muy divertido. Eso maestra es simpatica perooo es un poco aburrido y es como un maestra para chicos quien tienen tres o quatro anos...
7)World History C; Latin America - Talking about Drug Cartels and Illegal Immigrants and the culture of people who speak my favorite language. Perfect way to end my day. Oh, and the teacher is AWESOME.
I realize that Minnesota is viewed as a dreary, dismal, wet place (I mean 10,000 lakes, right?) but in my eyes there's more to a place than the geographical features. When you plan a vacation, you want to go somewhere because of the beautiful landscape or the favorable climate. How often do we go somewhere for the people? Now, I don't mean a vacation to see your family. I mean a trip for atmosphere.
Ever since I migrated to this new habitat, I've noticed a downturn in my own personality. Friday nights used to be the best things in the world. You just couldn't wait for the bell at the end of 11th period to ring because you had big plans for the night. If it was during the fall, you were going to the football game. If football season was over, all of your friends had a plan to get together. Whether you were going down to the river, or having a campfire, or hitting up chapel hill. There was always something to do.
Then I came to the north. Everything is so different. I spend hours every night studying. Just because I have to. It seems like people around here are so... so... dense. That's the word. My IQ has been higher than my teachers' ever since third grade. But I could take what I learned and apply it to real life and use it again later. I feel like people around here only swallow information to throw it up later. Not to absorb the nutrients from it to grow.
From fourth grade through eighth, I was in OASIS. OASIS stands for "Opportunities for Advanced Students in Stow." The reason you were put into OASIS was the following; you think differently . I think differently and I always have. It's just unfortunate that all of these kids have been so brainwashed into not being able to think outside of the box. Maybe that's why they're all stuck here. And will be. For generations more.
So here's my new schedule.. it's sooo much better
1)Honors Biology C - Last tri was okay. But this tri my teacher is SOOO much better.
2)Self-Defense... yeah
3)Honors Algebra 2C - It isn't that I didn't like my teacher last tri. I just think this tri will be a breeeeeeze. Thank god.
4) Digital Photography C - Don't worry.. I'll rant about my shitty teacher in that class in another post. I am gonna try to start posting more pictures though. I'm trying to get back into photography after having that teacher crush my passion for it...
5)Honors Lit/Writing II - No teacher will ever compare to my Honors 10 English teacher back at my old school. He actually taught me something.
6) Espanol III C - Me gusta mi maestra pero yo quiero tener mi maestro da la trimestere pasado... fue muy divertido. Eso maestra es simpatica perooo es un poco aburrido y es como un maestra para chicos quien tienen tres o quatro anos...
7)World History C; Latin America - Talking about Drug Cartels and Illegal Immigrants and the culture of people who speak my favorite language. Perfect way to end my day. Oh, and the teacher is AWESOME.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Hmmmm.
I usually would post these lyrics in a facebook status that's depressing because they remind me of him so much. So in an attempt to NOT piss facebook people off, here it goes.
My heart lies heavy
On dreams and expectations
And every night that I'm away from you
I'm always going
You wait with so much patience
I count the days until I'm home with you
The horizon hides Chicago
And summer brings the heat
The summer's all you need
And I won't let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm comin' home
And I won't let you down
I won't let you down
Oh, no
I've always heard that distances brings us closer
I don't feel close at all without you here
My stomach turns
It's love that makes me nervous
Each time it brings me closer to relief
I'm northbound toward Chicago
And summer brings the heat
The summer's all you need
And I won't let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm comin' home
And I won't let you down
I won't let you down
I've gotta know that you'll be mine
And I'm all you need
I know it's hard for you to say
But say you'll wait for me
Summer brings the heat
The summer's all you need
And I wont let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm comin' home
And I wont let you down
Oh, no
And summer brings the heat
This song is all you need
And I wont let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm almost home
And you won't let me down
You won't let me down
Not that Chicago has anything to do with him specifically. Although, it is kinda the halfway point between us. I don't know. This was just one of those songs that you forget is in your iTunes and it comes on and you're like... oh. That's about all I've got to say. <3
Also. Any boy that could play Sweet Home Alabama while sitting next to a campfire on a cool summer night in the middle of the country is all mine. No questions asked. Probably the best dream I've had in awhile..
My heart lies heavy
On dreams and expectations
And every night that I'm away from you
I'm always going
You wait with so much patience
I count the days until I'm home with you
The horizon hides Chicago
And summer brings the heat
The summer's all you need
And I won't let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm comin' home
And I won't let you down
I won't let you down
Oh, no
I've always heard that distances brings us closer
I don't feel close at all without you here
My stomach turns
It's love that makes me nervous
Each time it brings me closer to relief
I'm northbound toward Chicago
And summer brings the heat
The summer's all you need
And I won't let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm comin' home
And I won't let you down
I won't let you down
I've gotta know that you'll be mine
And I'm all you need
I know it's hard for you to say
But say you'll wait for me
Summer brings the heat
The summer's all you need
And I wont let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm comin' home
And I wont let you down
Oh, no
And summer brings the heat
This song is all you need
And I wont let you down
I wont let you down
The autumn breeze blows cold
But girl I'm almost home
And you won't let me down
You won't let me down
Not that Chicago has anything to do with him specifically. Although, it is kinda the halfway point between us. I don't know. This was just one of those songs that you forget is in your iTunes and it comes on and you're like... oh. That's about all I've got to say. <3
Also. Any boy that could play Sweet Home Alabama while sitting next to a campfire on a cool summer night in the middle of the country is all mine. No questions asked. Probably the best dream I've had in awhile..
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Sparkly Taco Stickers, and such.
Honors Freaking Biology. Ugh. Worst class of the day. I want to be a doctor, yes that's correct. But I learn absolutely nothing in this class. I learn more about biology watching paint dry than I do in this class. And the worst part of it is that it's 7th hour. Last class of the day. It drags on forever. And we never do anything. Why aren't we learning how to use this in our lives instead of doing pointless busy work? Ugh.
A few days ago, I walked my normal path from Biology to my locker. Out of the room. Slip my phone out of my pocket. Slide unlock key. Turn corner. Type password. Look up halfway to the doorway. Tap text icon. Look up to check posters on the wall. Look down at pho... Wait a minute. I take this exact same route with the same phone habit every single day. But something is different. The dull green monochromatic flier for the March 7th cocoa and cram has been adorned with a sticker of a sparkly taco. The last thing I expected to see. It made me ~chuckle~. I know a certain person who will enjoy my use of that verb.
Anyway, it got me thinking. We all remember the small things. I babble to this poor boy on the phone all the time. I know he hates it. But I do it anyway. I don't expect him to listen. But maybe someday he'll appreciate hearing something I have to say. I often express my needs and wants. Of all the rambling I do, he remembers the most amazing things. I love monkeys. I want one. So. Bad. Well, he remembered. Guess who got a monkey pillow pet for christmas? This girl. Right here.
I couldn't have asked for a better present, (especially with the included ring pops that I also expressed a desire for.) I could have received my dream truck or some fancy necklace. But these little things are the ones that count. I remember the little things.
I remember him telling me that there were originally 3 ring pops. I received to. He got hungry and ate one. Not an important detail. But the laughs we've had over moments like that are worth so much more than anything I can think of.
I remember things like sweaty italians running through parks. And black men who appear to want to "get their barry bonds on." I remember the white monster t shirt. I remember the birdless bird island. I remember all the little things that are so important.
If you've just skipped to the last sentence because this is where I usually sum it up, fuck you. Read the god damned blog. xoxoxo.
A few days ago, I walked my normal path from Biology to my locker. Out of the room. Slip my phone out of my pocket. Slide unlock key. Turn corner. Type password. Look up halfway to the doorway. Tap text icon. Look up to check posters on the wall. Look down at pho... Wait a minute. I take this exact same route with the same phone habit every single day. But something is different. The dull green monochromatic flier for the March 7th cocoa and cram has been adorned with a sticker of a sparkly taco. The last thing I expected to see. It made me ~chuckle~. I know a certain person who will enjoy my use of that verb.
Anyway, it got me thinking. We all remember the small things. I babble to this poor boy on the phone all the time. I know he hates it. But I do it anyway. I don't expect him to listen. But maybe someday he'll appreciate hearing something I have to say. I often express my needs and wants. Of all the rambling I do, he remembers the most amazing things. I love monkeys. I want one. So. Bad. Well, he remembered. Guess who got a monkey pillow pet for christmas? This girl. Right here.
I couldn't have asked for a better present, (especially with the included ring pops that I also expressed a desire for.) I could have received my dream truck or some fancy necklace. But these little things are the ones that count. I remember the little things.
I remember him telling me that there were originally 3 ring pops. I received to. He got hungry and ate one. Not an important detail. But the laughs we've had over moments like that are worth so much more than anything I can think of.
I remember things like sweaty italians running through parks. And black men who appear to want to "get their barry bonds on." I remember the white monster t shirt. I remember the birdless bird island. I remember all the little things that are so important.
If you've just skipped to the last sentence because this is where I usually sum it up, fuck you. Read the god damned blog. xoxoxo.
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